BE MORE CONCERNED WITH YOUR CHARACTER THAN YOUR REPUTATION BECAUSE YOUR CHARACTER IS WHO YOU REALLY ARE; WHILE YOUR REPUTATION IS MERLY WHAT OTHER PEOPLE THINK OF YOU.

Asher Roth - Be by myself video

by far my favorite track on the album, but this video is a gazillion +1 times better than the video for “I love college”, extremly dissapointed there, but what else do you expect from MTV these days? Oh & i’d totally cover him in paint, teehee, teehee.

oh yeah that’s right, i have a tumblr huh?

It’s just like me to get all mommy-ish right now, a week - one freaking week without the joy of my life & i miss her too much to enjoy it; irony at it’s best.

Tim Burton’s Alice in Wonderland

jolienoire:

saithis:

Johnny Depp as The Mad Hatter
Anne Hathaway as The White Queen
Michael Sheen as The White Rabbit
Helena Bonham Carter    …     The Red Queen
Alan Rickman as The Caterpillar
Mia Wasikowska as Alice
Crispin Glover as The Knave of Hearts
Stephen Fry as The Cheshire Cat
Christopher Lee as The Jabberwock
Timothy Spall as The Bloodhound
Matt Lucas as Tweedledee / Tweedledum
Noah Taylor as The March Hare
Eleanor Tomlinson as Fiona Chataway

———

Go on. Squeal, just a little bit, you know you want to.

so this is definitely a win.

March 5, 2010 i can not wait, i totally squealed.

HAHAHA.

funny craigslist posting (RDG, CA) via D.R

Fine, Don’t Fucking Hire Me, You Can’t Handle My Shit

What the fuck people! I need a motherfuckin job, and I have a resume that says I am fucking fit to be your goddamn front desk/​administrative assistant. I have applied to a ton of jobs on here, and not one of them responded, WHAT THE FUCK?! 

Cover Letter? Here’s my fucking cover letter! 
Now, I’m really low on money, and I’ll suck a dick if I have to…that’s right! 
Got a bear in your backyard that keeps eating your garbage? I’ll fight that motherfucker and I’ll win! Can any other prospective employee say that?! FUCK NO! What’d you say? You lost your keys? FUCK IT! I’ll shoot the goddamn lock off your door with my laser eyes! That’s how bad I need a motherfuckin job! Your brother is gay and you’re not cool with that? I’ll de-gay him with reverse buttsex.Don’t believe me?! Then hire me and I’ll fucking show you! 

OBJECTIVE 
I need a motherfuckin job. 

SHIT I HAVE DONE 
-I invented the moon. 
-Atlantis was around til 1988, but sunk when I shot out of my mom’s vagina like a silver bullet into a wolverine. 
-I am also a wolverine. 
-Had sex with the Spice Girls. 
-The blowjob machine was originally my idea until that bastard Clint Eastwood stole it. 
-I have prophetic visions of the apocolypse. 
-Watched the movie “Juwanna Mann” at least 18 times. http:​/​/​www.​imdb.​com/​title/​tt0247444/​ 
-Created a new genre of dance in which people get so into it that radiation waves pulsate off of them, I like to call this the microrave. 
-I reverse engineered a door, I now know how it works. 
-When I was 8, a frisbee flew into my backyard and I blew it up with my mind. 
-My brother is the Eiffel Tower 
-Direct descendant of Beowulf 
-Can make weapons out of anything, very useful in a hostile work environment 
-Beat my pornography addiction when I was 19 
-Proficient in Microsoft Office and Photoshop 

RELEVANT WORK EXPERIENCE 
GlomGlom Corporation of Evil Doing 
POSITION: Front Desk/​Administrative Assistant 
DUTIES: Setting up sex scandals in which to blackmail wealthy politicians, forwarding email, burning down the houses of the poor, loan sharking, answering phones, greeting clients in a manner that would frighten most people 

GreenHate Enterprises 
POSITION: Once Again, I was a fucking Front Desk/​Administrative Assistant 
DUTIES: Organizing the dumping of bio-waste into the ocean, peeing in lakes, digging holes to fill with garbage, making garbage out of perfectly good and useful items, filling said wholes with said garbage, creating fake facts about Greenpeace and publishing them on the internet(I am internet savvy), good at filing.​.​.​documents of hate. 

REFERENCES 
Glomgor Evil 
GlomGlom Corporation of Evil Doings 
gorlock@​peanutbutternip​ples.​com 

Sloblor the Muck Monster 
GreenHate Enterprises 
sloblor@​greenhate.​com 


So, now that you know the real me, are you gonna hire me or not? I would like to remind you that I can make weapons out of anything. 

Sincerely, 

Steve Madonna 
stevemadonnayea​h@​gmail.​com 


remember.​.​.​.​.​anything.​

We all know i love cupcakes and epidermis, so this officially awesome.